Wednesday, September 11, 2013

A few of my thoughts

 First thing is a cute little story of my little Peyton, Yesterday morning while we were eating breakfast he looked at me with milk dripping down his face and said Mom when you are a big girl and I am a big boy I will marry you! I hope/wish so much that even when my boys are older and have wife's they will still love me like this. I mean I know that the mother takes a back seat to the wife as it should be but I really want to have close relationships with these special boys that I love so very much. Peyton is only 3 years old but I am learning that they grow so very very fast.

On another note... this pregnancy I am 25 weeks along and I wish I had a way to really remember all of the physical changes and feelings that come along with being pregnant because there are parts that I really love and  think I will miss when my child bearing days are over like my favorite is feeling that little growing baby move. It is the coolest feeling in the world, the anticipation of seeing your new addition ( what will they look like? What kind of personality will they come with? etc..) This time around its really fun because its a little girl so there is a lot more anticipation because we don't know what to expect, I think it is for sure a wonderful blessing to able to be pregnant but Obviously there are  down sides like your tail bone that feels like its going to break every time you stand up after sitting for longer than 5 min, for me until I get to about 6 months I know my body is changing but it doesn't feel like I cant do stuff like get out of bed or turn in bed, bed over to tie shoes that sort of thing but It is definitely a different feeling to not be able to do those things with ease any more. Also my least favorite part is the first trimester with the sickness and from 6 months on the heart burn. I have a constant battle with my self that goes something like this.  I can't wait for this baby to be here, I hope she comes early, Its going to be so fun to hold her.... But then in the middle of the night when helping Peyton back into bed or Tate with a night mare I think to my self I totally can't have this baby I am going to be so tired all the time. How will I take care of three? but then almost as soon as I am done with those thoughts I am right back to being crazy beyond excited. I am really nervous to try and nurse because it didn't go so great the first 2 times but I am going to try some things that some friends have told me. One Friend said that a few months before she delivered she would start drinking tons of water and pumping to get her body use to the sensation. Another gave me a book that I need to read called The nursing mothers Companion, I think a lot of it is being relaxed which is something I really need to practice because I have never been great at it but I am hopeful this time around. All in all I love it and do feel it a blessing, I wish I was a perfect parent to my wonderful kids but I think I am doing the best I can so hopefully that is enough? 

1 comment:

  1. You are so tiny still. My friend documents her pregnancy once a month with a picture and answering the same few questions. Size of baby, her cravings, what her mood is like, if her ring is on/off, how the baby is moving,etc. About 20 in all. It has been fun to read and will be a great keep sake for later.